Personal blog
Something is sucking all the joy out of my life, and I think it might be the cutting down of this connection (but I am not sure).
If I could really trust that person, and if I wasn’t so prone to vulnerability and oversharing, that would be something!… Read the rest
It was interesting to come in contact with our Salsa teacher today, after absorbing a lot of media about his life on social media since the last class.
It felt strange, if I am honest. And it made me realise that no one ever lives up to the lives they put online, or on social media.… Read the rest
Another school holiday period. Something has clicked into place in my mind. And now when I see Dads with their kids, and family photos of men with their families I finally understand that this is what is most likely happening in Turtle’s world behind this screen.… Read the rest
Team sport or social dancing is purported to be great exercise for our brains. We started the paid Salsa course tonight. It certainly feels wholesome, and so, so good cognitively. The people that can lead and the instructors said that it takes time to get the steps, and within a few months of practice it becomes second nature.… Read the rest
I feel so sad for my friend who lost her husband of 40 years today. I am wondering how she must be feeling, and if it feels empty and bleak, or rich and soft with big tears. I guess she is going to feel a range of different uncomfortable emotions for the foreseeable future.… Read the rest
There is simply nothing to be gained from complaining. And everything to learn through this very interesting experiment.… Read the rest
It is not my day.
I have struggled with my nervous system for most of it.
I am grateful for practices such as dancing, lengthening my inhale, brightly scented hand cream and cold water.
It also seems that humming and upbeat music is uplifting, albeit a little anxiety provoking.
Some therapists believe that the pathway to secure attachment lies in healing of our dysregulated nervous systems. This is the realm of Polyvagal theory. It makes sense to me intellectually. However, engaging in the co-regulating practices through a computer screen this evening leaves me feeling worse than when I began the workshop.… Read the rest
It was such an interesting experience to find myself in a losing position in my chess game with my Dad tonight.
I was assessing my options, and all I could see, through all the different possible moves I could make was carnage of my pieces on the board.… Read the rest
Coming home is usually such a growth experience for me.
I tend to learn a lot about myself and how I have been impacted by our family dynamic.
Hopefully I can carry these lessons with me as I travel.
I could look back at what I wrote during my last visit and see if it helped me develop.… Read the rest